"I've noticed in those (nature) programs how the young males often leave the herd at an early age." -- Calvin and Hobbes, Feb. 17, 1991

From this we get the phrase "the lion's share." For a 21st-century version of this story, go west, young man, to the Yearning For Zion Ranch of the Fundamentalist Latter Day Saints near Eldorado, Texas.

Anyone who hasn't heard about the recent raid on the polygamist FLDS compound and the subsequent accusations of May-December "marriages" under the banner of religion must have been living under a pile of Texas limestone. And in a world in which the male-female ratio tends to stay roughly equal, there's this question: How does a church that has canonized the Gospel According to Jan and Dean ("Two(-plus) girls for every boy") make the numbers work out?

Well, as an April 20 Fort Worth Star-Telegram report reminded us, one way is to boot the young males out of the community.

Reporter Jack Douglas Jr. wrote that according to anti-abuse activist Brenda Jensen, boys "as young as 13 have been torn from their families and left on the unfamiliar streets of Salt Lake City and Las Vegas for committing such infractions as talking to a girl, or rolling up their sleeves."

One of these "lost boys" -- hundreds have fled or been forced out in the last few years -- commented in a July 2006 article for Salon.com: "I was basically dumped on my head. I had no understanding of how to live on my own."

Every now and then, a magazine or newspaper brings us the latest report from biologists or other scientists trying to figure out why people act as they do. The idea often seems to be: Well, we're wired that way -- we evolved in this fashion to survive, and so we tend to default to aggression, promiscuity or whatever.

Today's discussion is not about whether this or that aspect of human nature should be filed under "Natural selection," "Creation" or "Fall."

What the FLDS have provided is a snapshot of what happens when "Homo sapiens" chooses to behave like, say, "Panthera leo."

In traditional churches, leaders see adolescent boys as young people to be nurtured and guided, even when they become troublesome. In a pride of lions, young males get exiled by the king -- or, if they're particularly unlucky, eaten.

It seems that at least some among the FLDS, fixated on suzerainty and sex, have opted for the leonine approach.

It's ironic that a church seems not to have absorbed the Bible's implicit lessons on the downsides of multiple-choice marriage. Exhibit A is the famous triangle of Leah, Rachel and Jacob. The story in the Torah would be almost comical if it weren't so heart-wrenching. The two sister-wives essentially have a baby-making contest, even going so far as to drag their handmaidens into the tangle as proxies.

At one point, when Leah is ahead 4-0 in the Son Bowl, Rachel loses it.

"Give me children, or I shall die!" she cries to her husband (Genesis 30:1, Revised Standard Version).

Jacob barks back: "Am I in the place of God, who has withheld from you the fruit of the womb?"

Somehow it sounds like the Hebrew patriarch, given a full-disclosure "deal or no deal" on multiple mates, would have opted for the latter.

And of course, there's another difference between people and animals. Among the beasts of the field, the life schedule basically can be reduced to (1) Eat something; (2) reproduce; (3) repeat as long as possible. The alpha male in the herd never pledges himself to love, honor and cherish his significant other(s).

People have tended to aim a little higher. "Matrimony was ordained," said the 1662 Book of Common Prayer, "... for the mutual society, help and comfort, that the one ought to have of the other, both in prosperity and adversity."

It's always possible for human beings to take their behavioral cues, consciously or not, from lions and tigers and bears. The problem is, it seems to work so much better for the animals.

Alan Cochrum is a member of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram editorial board. Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services.