Provo residents Zach and Andrea Barber waited five years after marrying to have kids. Even so, Zach never felt "ready" for fatherhood.

"My experience with other babies was that I didn't like them very much," the 29-year-old truck driver joked. "When she was born it was surreal. There was this little person and I thought, 'I guess I'm a dad.' "

In the United States, some 1.5 million men become fathers each year. And Utah boasts the nation's highest birth rate. In 2006 alone, the stork brought more than 53,000 bundles of joy to the Beehive State, according to the National Center for Health Statistics.

Thirteen months and hundreds of diaper changes later, Barber considers himself a bonafide dad. But it wasn't always that way for this first-time father. While resources abound for mothers-to-be, new dads like Barber can often feel lost in the mix. As a woman's belly grows, so, too, can a new father's anxiety.

"There is a vortex of media and information swirling around motherhood in general," said Greg Bishop, author of "Hit the Ground Crawling: Lessons from 150,000 New Fathers."

"As soon as a woman gets pregnant, everyone wants to talk to her, sell her something. Dads are just left on the sidelines."

The scene is all too familiar for sisters Heather Shelley and Megan Keller, both practicing doulas in Orem. A doula -- which comes from the Greek word for "a woman who serves" -- refers to a trained professional who provides continuous physical and emotional support before, during and after birth.

Although their primary concern is mother and baby, Shelley and Keller are experts on soothing nervous dads.

"I've had dads pass out in the delivery room and other dads go home to feed the dog," Shelley said.

To each his own, the sisters say, as long as mother and father have talked about their expectations for labor and delivery beforehand. The sisters recently started Mothering Your Way, an Orem-based business offering prenatal classes, support groups, massages and midwifery and doula services for parents-to-be in Utah.

To address men's anxiety, Mothering Your Way will offer a new fatherhood class on Oct. 18, taught by Weber State University professor and father Russ Rampton.

Keller said the goal of the course is to teach fathering skills from a male perspective. Classes will address a father's role in the birthing process. Rampton also plans to discuss how bathing, diapering and supporting a mother's breastfeeding can bring a new father closer to his child.

Shelley and Keller both emphasized that men need to be an advocate for their wives in the hospital. For example, many doctors will ask a woman during a contraction if she wants an epidural.

"That's like running a marathon and having someone drive up and say, 'I'll take you to the end with my car.' Dad should be able to answer all the questions for her," Shelley said.

Having a birth plan -- a written document stating what the parents want from the birth -- relieves a lot of stress on delivery day, they said.

"They've had time to talk about it," Shelley said. "Because during labor is a bad time to disagree."

To prepare for the arrival of their daughter, Anistyn, Barber and his wife, like many other couples, took a prenatal class at their hospital.

"We felt really prepared," Barber said. "Even though our daughter arrived two weeks early, we already knew where to go and what to do."

Parents-to-be should plan to take a class about three months before the baby's due date.

Intermountain Healthcare and MountainStar Healthcare hospitals in Utah County offer a variety of prenatal classes that can be valuable to first-time dads. A basic four-week prenatal class typically covers labor stages, hospital admittance, recovery and infant care.

For those opting for a birth without pain medication, hospitals also hold Lamaze classes to teach breathing techniques that reduce discomfort. In these classes, a "coach," usually the father, is required to attend.

Beyond the pregnancy 101 that classes and books offer, Barber's No. 1 advice for dads-to-be is to simply, "Do what your wife wants you to do." Greg Bishop, author and father of four, agrees, telling his clients to serve as their wife's "punching bag."

In 1990, Bishop founded Boot Camp for New Dads, a hands-on workshop offered in more than 260 hospitals, community centers and churches across the nation. After all, he said, "Nothing is more beneficial to a mother than a dad that is prepared and on the job."

In the boot camps, veteran dads train rookies on feeding, burping, bathing, diapering and swaddling a newborn. But it's not all dirty work. The men also talk finances, relationships and babyproofing a home.

"By far the most prevalent advice from our veteran dads is to 'Take care of mom. No matter what she is experiencing, no matter how tough she is on you, take care of her,' " Bishop said.

"New moms can be very tough on new dads," he continued. "She's going to change her whole perspective on her husband. She's totally forgotten why she loved him in the first place and is looking for him to step up as a dad."

For that reason, Bishop suggests kicking the sappy stuff up a notch. Buy her favorite ice cream without being asked, bring home flowers, paint the nursery.

In his new book, "Crash Course for New Dads," Bishop offers checklists and cheat sheets for clueless dads-to-be. Among the advice for new fathers is to bond with their babies early on.

"A lot of men go into the birth expecting this wonderful bonding experience and it doesn't happen," Bishop said. For women, who have carried their child in the womb for nine months, bonding comes naturally, he said. Men need to take the time to connect personally.

Although Barber thought it was "surreal" to be a new dad, months of bonding with his daughter has created a special relationship.

"That's been the best pleasant surprise about the whole thing is how much I love this person," he said.

But cheat sheets and classes aside, Barber admitted, "You can never be absolutely ready for a baby."

"You are tired and your life completely changes," he said. "You have less freedom and more responsibility. But, shoot, it's worth it. It's awesome having a little family. You're never going to feel quite ready to do it. For most people, it's the greatest thing that ever happened to them."

If you go

Preparing for fatherhood class

When: Oct. 18 from 6-9 p.m. Additional classes will be held once a month.

Where: Mothering Your Way, 898 S. State Street Suite 11, Orem

Who: Taught by father and Weber State University professor Russ Rampton

What: The goal of the course is to teach fathering skills from a male perspective and address a father's role in the birthing process. Rampton also plans to discuss how bathing, diapering and supporting a mother's breastfeeding can bring a new father closer to his child.

Cost: $25

Info: Register by calling 227-4213 or e-mailing info@motheringyouway.com; For more information, visit www.motheringyourway.com.

Prenatal classes

For more information on prenatal classes, contact your local hospital:

Intermountain Healthcare hospitals -- (801) 714-3327

Mountain View Hospital (Payson) -- 465-7090

Timpanogos Regional Medical Center -- 714-6336

Ten tips for dads-to-be

You're never fully ready, most dads admit. But, chances are, these tips might help:

Go to the doctor -- "This is the single most important thing you can do during the pregnancy, as visits with the mother's obstetrician get you personally connected with what's going on both with the mother and your baby," said Greg Bishop, father of four and author of "Hit the Ground Crawling: Lessons from 150,000 New Fathers." "Being there lets Mom know she's not alone."

Indulge your wife's "nesting" instinct -- Help her set up the nursery and stock it with supplies, Bishop suggests. Complete any unfinished projects around the house that may be problematic with a new baby.

Get up to speed on her symptoms -- "You'll never keep up with her reading, but scan one of her favorite pregnancy books and you will surprise her with your knowledge," Bishop said.

Never underestimate the power of a back rub -- "Most pregnancy back pain centers around the sacrum, or tailbone," said Megan Keller, doula and co-owner of Mothering Your Way, an Orem business that offers classes, massages and full-service delivery assistance. "Many men make the mistake of massaging the curve of the back."

Don't forget the basics -- Complete a will and purchase life insurance. Add your child onto your health insurance plan.

Be an advocate in the hospital -- Discuss beforehand what you and the mother want out of the delivery so you are prepared to answer the doctor's questions. "Because during labor is a bad time to disagree," said Heather Shelley, doula and co-owner of Mothering Your Way in Orem.

Go out of your way to bond with baby -- "Remember, Mom's connection is hard-wired; fathers have to build theirs," Bishop said. Take any chance you get to hold, cuddle and care for your new child.

Your attitude counts -- "New moms often find themselves in an emotional roller coaster ranging from happiness to inadequacy," Bishop said. Don't mope because Mom's attention is not on you. Instead, focus on how to boost her sense of humor and enjoy your time as a new family.

Mom is always right -- "Do what your wife wants you to do," Zach Barber, a new Provo father, advised. "Be her punching bag," Bishop added.

Don't be hard on yourself -- "Fatherhood is about growing up and accepting responsibility," Bishop said. "For most men, this takes time, so cut yourself some slack, but keep moving forward."