Brittani Lusk
When Joan and Phil Jones met, they were on a double date with other people. Joan was with Phil's best friend and he was with another girl. Soon after, the two became part of a threesome of friends. The two young men (Phil and his friend) and Joan spent summer days at the pool in Payson where she worked as a lifeguard. In the end, Phil got the girl after a romantic ride home on Phil's bicycle with Joan on the handle bars.
"She is a wonderful companion and always has been. Our marriage has just grown through the entire 52 years of it. She's intelligent. She has a wonderful personality. She's always upbeat," Phil said of his wife.
The valentines were honored Feb. 1 for their lasting marriage at the Extraordinary Marriage Awards in Salt Lake City. Four other Utah County couples were also honored including Soren and Fern Cox, Provo; Max and Melba Nelson, Genola; Allan and Leah Tidwell, Provo; and Lynn and Linda Higgins, Alpine.
Joan Jones said she didn't have any romantic feelings for Phil at first because he was short -- about three inches shorter than her -- but she thought he was a fun guy and the couple became friends, "and then I just fell in love," Joan said.
It can be scary to take the plunge. Marriage can be full of unknowns, and many marriages end in divorce. Richard Miller, director of the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University, said the key to finding happiness like the Jones's is in finding a best friend.
"He was a really good friend," Joan Jones said of Phil and their courtship.
Miller said it's the friendship that keeps marriages vital.
"I'm convinced that that is the foundation of a strong marriage, because if you have a strong friendship, the romance will blossom over the years," Miller said.
Miller's definition of friendship means wanting to be with someone more than anything else, spending time together, talking and finding common interests.
"If I have three minutes of spare time, I'd rather talk to [my wife] than anyone else," Miller said.
Marriages also take work.
"I think we work at marriage every day, not hard, but some of the time," said Fern Cox. "When we were in Minnesota and [Soren] was getting his doctorate there, we had to borrow furniture. We didn't have anything."
Soren Cox said his marriage to Fern has been about support. His advice for young couples is to make a strong commitment, keep it and care more about your spouse than yourself.
"We both cared more for what happened to the other than what happened to ourselves," Soren Cox said.
Fern remembered how Soren would get up at 4 a.m. to clean floors for a living.
Phil Jones recommended that young people select a spouse who shares the same principles and ideas -- even though he said not to hold out for the knight on the white horse.
"I just don't believe there is the one and only," Phil said.
Joan Jones agrees with Soren Cox: care more about the other person than you care about yourself, play together and don't sweat the small stuff.
"Keep things in perspective. Some thing aren't worth fighting over," Joan Jones said.
• Brittani Lusk can be reached at 344-2549 or at blusk@heraldextra.com.
Posted in Local on Wednesday, February 13, 2008 11:00 pm
© Copyright 2009, Daily Herald, Provo, UT | Terms of Service and Privacy Policy