Some of you people out there are all ready for Christmas and are just waiting for Tuesday night and Wednesday. Christmas Eve and Christmas Day hold no fear for you.

You’ve done all of your shopping. You’ve done all of your baking. You’ve done all of your mailing and delivering. You people make me sick!

You’re the kind of people who have already started making a list for your after-Christmas shopping. You’re going to buy stuff right after the holiday for what you intend to give people next year.

You’ll buy gifts on deep discount when the clearance sales are going on and smugly stow away stuff for next year. There’s probably a few of you psychopaths out there who will even wrap it up in Christmas paper and tie bows on next year’s gifts before New Year’s Eve this year.

I can just see it now – a dozen heated, wearable blankets (“electric snuggies?”) purchased for $9.99 each, all carefully wrapped and stacked in the back of a closet. They’re all ready for Christmas 2020.

I guess you can see my Christmas anxiety manifesting itself as vindictiveness towards people who plan ahead and don’t procrastinate. It’s a common syndrome. Procrastinators tend to think of non-procrastinators as having defective personalities.

Dumb guys like me like to categorize smart, non-procrastinator people, as being a little wacky and “too tightly wrapped.” (These people even wrap their Christmas gifts extra tight with the tape placed just exactly so, all prim and proper.)

In truth, it all boils down to envy, I suppose. I wish I were more on the ball and not quite so derelict, when it comes to Christmas preparations.

All is not lost. I do have a few precious days left to solve all my Christmas anxieties. I often say, “If it weren’t for the last minute, nothing would ever get done.”

I think I just need to take a few deep breaths and pause. Perhaps I need to pat myself on the back for the things that I have gotten done so far this Christmas season. Some therapists say that we need to focus on the good things that we’ve done and not worry quite so much about all of the undone things.

I have successfully put Christmas lights up on the outside of the house. Yay for me! That’s no small thing.

I have helped someone who didn’t have a Christmas tree by cutting a real tree for them. And yes, I had a tag, and yes, it came from a legal area up on the mountain (as opposed to one cut illegally from the cemetery in the dead of night).

I struggled getting that tree into an old stand we had laying around in the garage. When we delivered the tree, it was gratefully received. That tree looks good and is standing relatively straight – if you shut one eye and partially shut the other eye.

I helped my wife deliver some neighborhood gifts up and down the street. That wasn’t easy. And, it took time. Everyone wants to visit. Sheesh! Don’t people know that the holiday season is a busy time? It isn’t a time to lollygag around and chat and tell each other how wonderful we are. That’s what time at Wal-Mart is for.

Gee, I’m feeling a little better already. I really have done a few things for Christmas. I’m not quite as unprepared as I thought.

I’m trying really hard right now not to think of the “undone things.” It’s not easy because it seems like there are so many.

When am I going to find the time to watch the movie “It’s A Wonderful Life?” I haven’t made fudge yet. Will I finally learn the lyrics to Mele Kalikimaka this year? hen there is that little nagging Christmas item that can’t be put off forever. What do I give my wife for Christmas this year?

I just have to remember my answer that I give to people when they ask, “Are you ready for Christmas?” My answer generally is, “I’ve found that Christmas happens regardless of whether I’m ready or not.”

But never fear. I will be ready. One way or another, I will declare myself ready.

And in all my preparations and lack of preparations, I am attempting to remember “the reason for the season.” It’s sometimes difficult, but it can be done. I am trying to be nice to people. I’m trying to keep “WWJD” (What Would Jesus Do?) in mind. When all else fails, I tune into the Hallmark Channel for a few minutes. That either makes me or breaks me.

Enjoy the Christmas season. Have a great time with family and friends. And if you know someone who doesn’t have a friend or a family, include him or her somehow in your Christmas circle.

I’ll sign off with a Christmas “smile” that I like.

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. “But why,” they asked, as they moved off. “Because,” he said, “I can’t stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.”