Those people who haven’t had the opportunity to enjoy the wind blowing through their hair as they putt off to work on a scooter in the hot days of July are really missing something. However, behind the whimsical fun lies a dark truth — danger lurks around every corner. When it comes to motorized, two-wheeled vehicles, scooters just aren’t built the same as motorcycles. Motorcycles have large wheels, better control, solid framework, and you can wear full body leather without looking like your imitating cat woman. For those reasons alone, check out my Top Ten list of reasons riding a scooter is much more hardcore than a motorcycle.

1. Gravel — Gravel from the road hits you in the face, head and back, and if that isn’t bad enough, it can often lodge in your tires causing the bike to balk.

2. Wind — A scooter’s small frame easily gets tossed around like a wet blanket when its windy and it can be very hard to maintain control.

3. Hills — Scooters sometimes lack gumption. Every once in a while, if a hill is really steep, you are lucky to get 5 mph as you crawl up on your scooter. Your nerves fray as you worry that at any moment momentum will give way, and you’ll start going backwards.

4. Garbage trucks — The odor alone will kill you it’s so bad … never pull up next to one on a scooter! You’re completely unprotected from the stench.

5. Road construction — Freshly paved or bumpy unfinished roads due to construction can cause spin outs and almost certain bodily harm because the small wheels of the scooter can’t adjust to the new terrain the way larger wheels can.

6. Speed bumps — Catching air on a scooter is never a good thing … ouch!

7. Unexpected speed increase — Picture this: You’re just cruising along at 25 mph on your scooter, loving life. Then you turn a corner into a 50 mph speed zone. You hit the gas, but your scooter starts to huff and puff and you’re left with nothing else to do but pray that a large car won’t bump you over as you look for somewhere to turn off.

8. Pot holes — On a scooter, your wheels are so small they can often fit inside pot holes in the road, sending the rest of you, scooter included, flipping over the handlebars and onto the pavement.

9. Baby quail — Small baby animals of any kind (but especially including quail) are total road hazards for scooters. You can see them and attempt to swerve, but sometimes they’re hard to miss as they meander across the road.

10. Rain — Speeding down the road during a rainstorm transforms the little droplets of water into virtual pebbles that hit your body and stone you to death as you drive.