I found a blog, “Make the Holidays Successful for Kids on the Autism Spectrum” on http://learnbehavioral.com that has eight tips for families to implement that may reduce the anxiety of the season, a few of which I wanted to share. Reading these tips can help family members or friends of those on the spectrum be more patient and understanding of the different stresses and fears that may come with holiday celebrations. Much of the information is gathered from blogs by Holly Bird, a retired health counselor in Arizona.

The first tip is to talk to your family about what to expect during the upcoming weeks. It’s important for everyone to understand the potential for behaviors at inconvenient times.

“The biggest thing we try to do for the holidays is to make sure the family knows that when we’re together as a family, it isn’t all about the child with autism” and the whole family responding to the child’s behavior, she says. “It’s all of us being calm and … him just being able to do what he regularly does in his normal routine.”

Another recommendation is that families change their own expectations. “It is hard,” Bird says, “because people’s expectations of the holidays have been pounded into our heads for so many years. Families coping with autism can’t do things the way things have always been done, she says. And that’s OK.”

It is also important to have a “settle-down” space where the child or adult can go to calm down. Many times individuals on the spectrum who are over stimulated just need a quiet place to incorporate some of the methods they have learned to calm themselves.

Being mindful of noises and other stimulators is important to help manage potential struggles. For the person with autism giving them early warning about potential noises and letting them know they won’t last long can be helpful along with giving them headphones if necessary. For other family members or friends it can be helpful to just alert them of the impact some noises may have on the child or adult.

The bottom line is that properly managed events can be enjoyed by everyone with just a little extra preparation time and patience. Don’t force the person with autism to do things they don’t like and give them plenty of breaks.

“Flexibility and patience are good gifts to have for yourself”, Bird says. “They help reveal what the holidays are all about.”