A miscarriage can shatter the world of any expecting mother and family. The impacts of such loss leading to feelings of shame, emptiness and isolation.

McKay Lenker Bayer, a Provo mother and artist, knows those feelings personally.

Bayer experienced a miscarriage in 2021. Not long after, she eventually gave birth to her son, who is now 2 years old.

Still reeling with the trauma of infant loss while she was expecting triggered anxiety. “I was terrified of another loss, terrified of wanting a child. It really is so complex,” Bayer explained.

She struggled even more when postpartum depression kicked in. “It’s the most insane thing in the world. … It’s almost impossible to even really understand” she said.

The experience inspired her to tell a story about pregnancy loss and new motherhood through an art exhibit. “Mère Maison,” as she calls it, uses a variety of patterns, colors and imagery. Her message is communicated through a series of houses with legs that represent a mother.

Inside are waving hands representing a symbol of life, though some of the pieces depict an infant loss showing an open door to an empty house, an idea that came about after talking with her yoga instructor. “‘You are your baby’s home,’ my prenatal yoga teacher told me,” Bayer told the Daily Herald. “As my baby grew, so did his home. And so did my respect and reverence for motherhood. Each of these houses is a tribute — a small monument — to the act of creating and nurturing life and all the complexities that come with it.”

Bayer feels more awareness is needed about the pain a parent feels after losing a child and navigating the birth of a newborn.

Nearly a quarter of all pregnancies end in miscarriage, and 1 in 8 women report experiencing depression after giving birth, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

A sense of empathy and having community can play a role in helping mothers cope. That’s why Lyndsey Proctor started Serenity Recovery & Wellness seven years ago. The business is a maternal mental health center that specializes in treatment and healing for women during pregnancy and postpartum stages, with professionals trained to help manage infant loss. “It’s such a disenfranchised grief. A lot of moms will tell me I didn’t come home with my baby, and I don’t know if I am a mom (or) am I not a mom,” Proctor said.

She wanted to create a space that’s unlike a traditional hospital, where moms can get therapy and connect with mothers facing similar challenges. “It’s so important, especially just to not feel alone and, like, you can get through this,” Proctor said.

Bayer said she hopes others who’ve shared her experience into motherhood and visit her gallery walk away knowing they aren’t alone “and that other people are out there expressing themselves, and also sort of like a way to kind of cope.”

“Mère Maison” is on display until June 29 at Writ & Vision rare books and fine art gallery, located at 274 W. Center St. in Provo.