Hooray! The Iowa caucuses are done. When it comes to politics, we can now hear about the New Hampshire primary election ad nauseum until we’re sick to death of that.

But we need to pay attention. The presidential general election is just around the corner. It’s only about 10 months away! Just think — we only have a winter, a summer, and deep into fall, before we cast our general election ballots!

If we blink, we’re going to miss it! With so little time left, it’s no wonder that the media is all in a hubbub over the political process.

Okay, I’m being a little sarcastic and making fun of our political calendar. I was given a tee shirt not long ago which reads: “Sarcasm is my second language and I speak it fluently.”

This political thing though, is really quite annoying to some people. (And, I’m a “people.”) I know a few Sanpeters who would rather watch fishing or bowling on TV for five hours for every five minutes they accidentally hear any political news on television.

Weirdly, and I’m not really sure why, I’ve been following quite closely the field of Republican candidates for president over the past few months. I often flip channels between CNN, Fox and MSNBC. It’s no wonder I have psychological problems.

It’s weird that I’m even interested. Given the cast of characters in the race for the presidency. But like I said, if you don’t pay attention, you’ll miss all the action.

That bunch of Republicans who threw their hats in the ring has finally narrowed down a bit. On the Democratic side, without challengers to the incumbent. it’s not all that interesting.

Our presidential selection system continues to amaze me. The system we have seems really weird to me.

Right now, once again, I’m thinking about the Iowa caucus and the New Hampshire primary voting events. The candidates have been on the trail in those states campaigning hard. They visit those states over and over and over again. It’s so strange to me that such a small sampling of people of two smallish states has such an influence on the national process of selecting a president. Candidates drop out of the running based on poor showings in Iowa and New Hampshire.

It has somehow evolved, that the voting in Iowa and New Hampshire has a huge impact on presidential elections in this country. Candidates stomp around these states spending tons of money advertising and giving away food and drink.

To demonstrate how weird I think this system is, I have come up with the following fictional, hypothetical scenario. We don’t do things this way in Sanpete County, but I believe the hypothetical scenario is apt. Imagine this:

I’ve decided that I want to become a Sanpete County commissioner. I find out that one of the first things I must do is to court the favor of people involved in a voting event to be held in Jerusalem, Sanpete County, Utah. (Think of Iowa)

Many of you know that Jerusalem is a proverbial “wide place in the road” with very few homes on the west side of the Sanpete Valley not far from Maple Canyon. It’s a nice area, with a tiny population.

Of the small number of Jerusalem residents, there are a few of them who will actually be voting in a special event on who they think should be the Sanpete County commissioners. For some unknown reason, the opinions of these few people who come out of the woodwork every four years are considered to be very significant.

The candidates for commissioner and the rest of the people in Sanpete County, through some sort of random evolution, have come to rely on these Jerusalem voters as to who should be the favorites to be put on the ballot for general elections. My fellow candidates and I will spend a lot of time in Jerusalem.

We’ll also spend lots of money advertising to these people. Oh, and don’t forget that I personally will be giving these voters the choice between rocky road ice cream and cookie dough ice cream. This is symbolic of me being “nuts” to be running for office and that I’m spending a lot of “dough” in my quest to become a commissioner.

When it comes time to vote, maybe four or five people will show up and cast their ballots. We the candidates, based on the outcome, will decide if it is worth continuing in our quest for political office.

For those of us who continue, our next stop will be doing the same thing all over again for a few voting people in a primary election in Axtell (read that: New Hampshire). Axtell will really be a make or break vote. It’s going to take a lot of ice cream and barbeque to win there.

I might personally do poorly in both events in Jerusalem and Axtell. I might be really discouraged that those few voters with so much power didn’t like my ice cream.

Those voters might not have liked my plan to build a 16-story County Administration Tower Annex. They may not like that Six Flags Magic Mountain, the amusement park company, is backing me. They might not think that a “Tower of Terror” ride on the side of the county building is a good idea, though it would be a money maker.

If I’m discouraged, I will drop out of the race and give up on my dream of becoming a Sanpete County commissioner. In the process, nobody in Mt. Pleasant, Fairview, Moroni, Ft. Green, Ephraim, Manti, Gunnison or anywhere else in the county would have had a chance to vote for me. Nobody in the population centers of the county, including the Greater Chester Metroplex would have had a chance to taste my ice cream and eat my barbeque.

In effect, a very small handful of voters in Jerusalem (Iowa) and Axtell (New Hampshire) would have determined my political success or failure in the county. Weird, huh? — Merrill

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