Q: How do I know if my young kid is ready for scary content?

A: Different things scare different children; it’s not always possible to predict what will frighten a particular kid. Introducing scary stuff to preschool-age children also is tricky because kids this age can’t readily tell the difference between what’s real and what’s fantasy, so they can be as scared of something pretend as something real.

In general, Common Sense Media recommends avoiding scary programming (including emotional intensity, separations of parents and kids, and parents and kids in peril) for preschool-age kids. When kids do see something that scares them, the best comfort is reassurance that everyone is safe (plus a hug and a favorite toy).

Here are some general guidelines:

Age 0-2: No violence or scary stuff. Also nothing emotionally intense.

Age 2-3: Anything that involves physical or emotional peril or separations of parents and kids (human or animal) can be scary and upsetting. Also avoid emotional intensity, loud/sudden noises, and situations with violence as the only means of conflict resolution.

Age 3-5: Violence may start to be harder to ignore, especially if kids watch cartoons. Avoid shows and movies in which characters use violence to resolve conflict — but if it comes up, talk about alternative ways characters could have solved a problem.

Q: What should I say to my kid about sexy Halloween costumes?

A: Add the word “sexy” to pretty much anything and you have the inspiration for any number of women’s Halloween costumes. Sexy nurse, sexy cop, even sexy Olaf! It’s bad enough that party stores separate kids’ costumes into dated, strict gender roles (policemen for boys, princesses for girls). But when you get a costume catalog, go to the store, or do a Google search, you’re bombarded with the sexed-up versions of getups designed only for women.

At some point, your kids will start to notice that most of the options for women are ridiculously revealing. More than simply explaining that these disguises are for grown-ups, you can take the opportunity to help kids understand the sexy-costume phenomenon, how it sells women short, and how they can reject it and replace it with positive role models who communicate strength, intelligence — or anything else they want to be for Halloween (or in life).

Talk back. You’re not the only parent who’s fed up. Write the company selling this merchandise and give them a piece of your mind. If your kids are old enough, encourage them to write letters.

Find positive role models. From Mayim Bialik to Mother Theresa, there are plenty of female role models for kids to dress up as. In fact, Halloween is a great time to really get into character. Look for inspiration from pop culture, history, books, and video games — the sky’s the limit.

Explain that some industries are behind the times. Just as many Hollywood movies reinforce dated stereotypes, mainstream Halloween costumes stubbornly refuse to see women for anything other than their potential for sexiness. Tell your kids that these ideas are limiting and insulting — and that your family doesn’t agree with them.

Separate “sex” from “sexism.” Sex between consenting adults is OK. And it’s natural for teens and even tweens to want to experiment with sexuality on a night when anything goes. Make sure older kids understand that you’re complaining about costumes that reduce women to the sum of their parts, not judging people for wanting to wear those costumes. And if your teen wants to be a little daring on Halloween, that’s a different conversation.

Explain how sex moves products faster. The Halloween selling season is short, about three months. In that time, costume companies need to make as much money as possible. The outrageousness of sexy Halloween costumes helps move merchandise quickly, since many folks choose to go all out on this night of all disguises.

Q: Is it OK to let my teen watch horror movies?

A: Pushing boundaries is a huge part of the movie-going experience for teens, but a lot of what’s marketed to them — for example, psychologically disturbing movies — are too mature. Guide teens toward age-appropriate thrillers and horror flicks or old-school classics (such as Hitchcock films). Follow these guidelines for when your teen wants to see horror movies.

Young teens:

They may be ready to be scared silly. In general, skeletons, monsters, and aliens are OK. Even so, stick to movies that have humor mixed in or those with safe-and-sound endings. Be mindful of blood and gore.

… Or not. Some teens still scare easily. Let your kids know it’s OK to be scared and to tell their friends they’d rather watch something else.

Older teens:

They may be ready for more than you think. Developmentally, teens can handle dramatic and psychological suspense, but kids under 16 still shouldn’t see slasher horrors, especially those that feature kids in dire danger or that have lots of gore.

Mind the messages. Many scary movies now pair horrific graphic violence with sexual situations — not a great combination for kids exploring newfound sexuality. Be sure to talk with them about the content of the movie they’re seeing and the messages it may convey. Check Common Sense Media’s reviews for conversation starters.

Dig into the vault. If you like scary movies too, try introducing your teens to some of the horror and suspense classics. Just make sure any younger siblings are already tucked in bed.