Another way to summarize that conversation might be with the old saying: “Misery Loves Company.” As it was President’s Day weekend, I was wearing a “stars and stripes” tie.

My “tie friend” let me know that he was wearing a favorite tie which he had worn for years. The tie had a Tabasco Sauce bottle motif and he pointed out that it was starting to show signs of wear. He was grieving that he might soon have to “put that tie down.”

I shared with him the concept of using the “Google Lens” feature on his phone to possibly identify where he could buy a replacement tie. A week later, he joyfully let me know that he had used the “take a picture trick” on Google. Success! He had found a source for buying a new favorite tie.

I don’t know exactly where the fashion of wearing neckties came from. I’m supposing that it evolved from a time eons ago when cavemen wore scarf-like animal skins around their necks to help keep themselves warm.

There was probably a practical reason like that, which has been lost in the present day practice of what to me is strictly a decorative purpose. But, of course, decoration is a purpose.

I know that here in Sanpete there is quite a bit of resistance to the wearing of neckties by many men. Sanpete guys are pretty darn practical and aren’t really fans of the idea of voluntarily choking themselves with an expensive piece of fabric on a daily basis. There are many who aren’t able to see the point of “tying one on” even for church or a wedding.

When I moved to Sanpete many years ago, I soon learned that ties were not the tradition for many men who were in occupations where in my previous experience, tie wearing had been the rule. It didn’t take me long to adapt. These days, if I wear a tie on a weekday, I usually get asked, “Is there a funeral today?”

My system for storing my ties leaves something to be desired. My wife gives me some sort of specialized hanger or gadget for them every few years. Those things never really work out for me. My ties seem to always end up on several regular, plastic clothes hangers. They just pile up there and sometimes a batch of them wind up on the floor.

I haven’t counted my ties for quite a while. But if I were betting, I’d say that I have more than a hundred. I’m sure some guys have more than that. I’m also pretty sure that many guys can count their ties on one hand.

All I know is that over the years with birthdays, Father’s Days, and Christmases, ties accumulate. And, of course, with my psychological hoarding problem, I can’t throw any of them out.

Each tie has a story. For instance, one is a gigantic, extra wide, extra long, wool tie that I haven’t worn in years. I was in Scotland on a trip many years ago when I was a college student. I bought the tie at the mill where it was woven. I’m too sentimental to get rid of that one.

When I was a church financial clerk someone gave me a tie with pictures of money all over it. I have a tie with multi-colored golf tees covering it. Someone gave that to me when I was attempting to be interested in golf years ago.

I have a Yogi Bear tie. It was given to me by the people who used to run the campground in Manti, which used to be the Yogi Bear Campground.

I like having a variety of ties. I tell people that if the formalities of society and church make me feel like I should wear a weird piece of cloth tied around my neck, I might as well make it interesting.

I have several ties that depict famous works of art. My wife has given me most of these over the years. They usually get a fair amount of attention when I wear them.

Among them is a surrealistic Salvador Dali “Persistence of Memory” tie. It’s the picture of what seems to be droopy watches hanging on trees in a desert.

I have a Mona Lisa tie. I like that one. Sometimes I wear “her” with a vest and “she peeks out” at people and I get comments. I respond, “What man doesn’t enjoy having a mysterious woman hang around his neck?”

The “Creation of Adam” tie (Sistine Chapel art) has created the most controversy. Of course, Michelangelo depicted Adam, and about everyone else in the Bible, in a classical nude condition. The fold of the tie makes it so that to see the complete anatomy of Adam, one must turn the tie over. And yes, lots of people are always reaching for my tie with an interest in seeing “all” of that famous work of art.

I still tie my neckties the same way I learned out of a Cub Scout manual when I was 9 or 10 years old. I think it’s a Double Windsor knot.

Fashions come and go. Ties may never be big in Sanpete for everyday wear. I won’t sorrow over that. But it is fun to dress up once in a while.

I wish we’d get back to classing up some occasions. Years ago, it used to be when we went to a recital, a play, a concert, a funeral, or a wedding reception, there would be more people dressed up than dressed down. Now, the pendulum has swung the other direction. Scruffy jeans, tee shirts and ball caps seem to be becoming the new normal.

I’m really not judging too harshly; I’m glad people are attending events regardless of what they’re wearing. And I certainly don’t dress up for every occasion either.

So, anyway, to end this and tie things up, I have an offer to make. If any of you need to borrow a tie, just let me know.

— Merrill